


That Don't Impress Me Much

by DevilsTrill



Category: Utena
Genre: Humor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2001-09-14
Updated: 2001-09-14
Packaged: 2013-05-05 02:51:13
Rating: K
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,126
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/402446/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/103631/DevilsTrill
Summary: *Songfic* Utena sings the song to Miki, Touga, and Akio. No good can come of it and no summary can describe this. ^n_n^





	That Don't Impress Me Much

That Don't Impress Me Much   
A Kitsune-onna production  
Lyrics by Shania Twain  
  
Author's Note and Disclaimer: This is a bit odd. I thought about this in the car on the way home from work (actually, I come up with all my songfics that way). The last two verses of the song are what caught my attention. I had to reach a bit for the first, but I think it worked in the end. Please read and respond. I love comments, they brighten my day.   
  
The song belongs to Shania Twain. And Utena belongs to me...well not really. I wish. These charries belong to whomever. I'm only using them for my enjoyment. Please don't sue cause I have no money. All that will be gotten is a bit of pocket lint. And any flames I receive will be used for my harem's next weenie roast.   
  
= actions  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
That Don't Impress Me Much  
  
The scene opens with Utena sitting on a bench outside Anthy's greenhouse. A thin blue-haired boy walks by reading a book. Utena looks up and starts to sing  
  
I've known a few guys who thought they were pretty smart  
  
Miki stops in his tracks and lowers the book, looking over at her curiously. He blinks several times and starts to walk again. Utena jumps up and stands in his path  
  
But you've got being right down to an art  
You think you're a genius--you drive me up the wall  
  
Miki points to himself as if to say, 'Are you talking to me?' Utena moves closer and rests an arm on his shoulder  
  
You're a regular original, a know-it-all  
  
Miki tries to sneak away, but Utena puts an arm around him. His cheeks begin to glow crimson  
  
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special  
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else  
  
She turns him so that he's facing her and she places her hands on his shoulders  
  
Okay, so you're a rocket scientist  
  
She pushes him backwards and he stumbles a bit  
  
That don't impress me much  
  
A question mark appears above Miki's head  
  
So you got the brain she touches her head   
But have you got the touch she runs her hands along her curves  
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright  
  
Miki mouths, 'You do?'  
  
But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night  
That don't impress me much  
  
Miki runs off and slams into Touga. He shakes it off, moves to the side and runs away. Touga straightens his duelist's uniform and then goes over to Utena. He puts an arm around her shoulders and she immediately shrugs out of his embrace  
  
I never knew a guy who carried a mirror in his pocket  
  
Touga pulls a mirror from his pocket  
  
And a comb up his sleeve--just in case  
  
He reaches up his sleeve and pulls out a comb. He runs his hand through his hair and acts all cool and Touga-like  
  
And all that extra hold gel in your hair oughtta lock it  
'Cause Heaven forbid it should fall outta place  
  
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special  
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else  
  
Touga continues to stand there as if trying to get Utena to just fall for him  
  
Okay, so you're Brad Pitt  
That don't impress me much  
  
His jaw drops and a sweatdrop forms. He can't believe she just said that. Although we all know it's true  
  
So you got the looks she runs a finger along his cheek   
But have you got the touch runs a finger along her own cheek  
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright  
  
Touga looks hopeful  
  
But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night  
That don't impress me much  
  
Touga sighs and walks away, feeling totally depressed. As he walks away, Akio drives up in his car. He sees Utena and he smiles, his teeth gleaming. Utena sees him and her eyes widen like a dear in the headlights. He pulls up beside her  
  
You're one of those guys who likes to shine his machine  
  
Akio pushes the passenger door open and gestures for her to get in  
  
You make me take off my shoes before you let me get in  
I can't believe you kiss your car good night  
  
Akio does a flip and lands on the hood of the car. Utena sweatdrops as she watches the chairman  
  
C'mon baby tell me--you must be jokin', right!  
  
Akio blinks several times.  
  
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special  
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else  
  
Utena leans on the hood  
  
Okay, so you've got a car  
  
He nods and gestures to the car  
  
That don't impress me much  
  
Akio facefaults  
  
So you got the moves Utena runs a finger along the hood of the car  
But have you got the touch Again, she runs her hands along her curves  
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright  
  
Akio smiles widely  
  
But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night   
  
He sighs and hangs his head  
  
That don't impress me much  
  
Touga comes out and joins Akio, dragging Miki behind him. The blue-haired boy tries his best to escape  
  
You think you're cool but have you got the touch  
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright  
But that won't keep me warm on the long, cold, lonely night  
That don't impress me much  
  
Akio flips into the driver's seat of the car. Touga opens up the passenger side, shoves Miki in, then climbs in himself  
  
Okay, so what do you think you're Elvis or something...  
  
Touga mouths, 'Who's Elvis?' The others shrug  
  
Whatever  
  
The door to the greenhouse opens and Anthy comes out. She smiles widely at Utena and goes over to her. Utena wraps an arm around Anthy's shoulders and turns back to the boys, smiling  
  
That don't impress me  
  
Utena winks at them and walks away with Anthy  
  
~Owari~  
  
  



End file.
